Bernice the Brake Pedal

Yesteryear

On-Board Diagnostics: The Dashboard That Tells You What’s Wrong

Detroit, MI — In a stunning announcement that has sent shockwaves through the classic car community, automotive historians have confirmed that the introduction

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 5, 2026

Tesla Denies Affair with Gas Station After Being Spotted There Three Nights in a Row

Palo Alto, CA — A local Tesla Model S is vigorously refuting rumors of an illicit affair with a neighboring Shell station, despite

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 3, 2026

Yesteryear

A Kitchen in Every Sedan: The 1948 Picnic Forecast

The American roadway is a marvelous laboratory of modern living, a truth that has not escaped the eagle-eyed engineers currently designing

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 3, 2026

News

Local Man’s ‘Project Car’ Officially Outlives Three Relationships and One Dog

Austin, TX — A primer-gray 1987 Ford Mustang LX sitting on four mismatched jack stands has officially achieved a milestone in longevity,

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 2, 2026

1989 Nissan Out Performs 2026 Chevrolet in Lane Avoidance Measures

Palmdale, CA— In a landmark independent track evaluation conducted this morning, a sun-faded 1989 Nissan Sentra XE successfully out-maneuvered a

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 2, 2026

News

Rear License Plate Light Bulb Hasn't Worked in Months and No One Seems to Care

Newark, NJ— The remaining, still-functional rear license plate light bulb on a 2017 Honda CR-V is entering its third month

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 2, 2026

Yesteryear

The Automatic Transmission Promises Freedom from Shifting — Mechanics Remain Unconvinced (1940's)

Detroit, MI — The General Motors Corporation has officially unleashed the Hydra-Matic transmission upon the American public, boldly promising a future where

By Bernice the Brake Pedal · Nov 2, 2026