The Random Bolt is pumping them out and plans on breaking the internets with a traffic jam of fresh fake automotive news.

This week we learned that even Jaguars get curious, sat on the edge of our seats while poor Sharon Lowe thawed her eyelashes, and found out that even floor mats have limits on carpools that transcend smell. If you thought that was everything, think again!

Curiosity Impounds the Cat: Local Jaguar F-Type Caught Snooping in Secure Tow Yard
Happy National Curious Events Day!
The Random BoltEddie Torr
Area Husband Confused as Wife Shivers in 62-Degree Arctic Zone of Dual-Climate SUV
Owensboro, KY — In a baffling defiance of modern thermodynamics, local wife Sharon Lowe was reported freezing to death this afternoon, despite sitting approximately four inches away from a personalized, digital climate zone blasting a tropical 76 degrees. The vehicle, a late-model SUV equipped with state-of-the-art dual-
The Random BoltBernice the Brake Pedal
Toyota Sedan Declared Disaster Zone After Acute Odor Exposure
Pasadena, CA — In an unprecedented medical and automotive crisis, a set of four all-weather floor mats was rushed to the Intensive Care Unit early Thursday morning following what witnesses describe as a “catastrophic biological event” in the passenger seat of a 2018 Camry. The mats, constructed from heavy-duty,
The Random BoltArthur the Gas Pedal
Brake Bleeder Wrench Laments Lifetime of Underutilization
Fargo, ND — Deep inside a toolbox, bottom drawer, cradled in a velvet-lined groove (actually just greasy shop rag residue) in the darkest recesses of a craftsman’s rolling chest, a MAC S134 5/16″ x 3/8″ 6 point brake bleeder 90 degree double box wrench is officially calling
The Random BoltArthur the Gas Pedal
Jeep Announces ‘Denim Edition’ Re-Release Because “Every Rugged Off-Roader Deserves a Great Pair of Jeans”
Engineered for Maximum Comfort (and Chafing)
The Random BoltArthur the Gas Pedal

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